My Love Story
No matter what kind of day I’ve had, I love knowing that when I walk through the door, I’ll be met by Dave’s warm smile, and the best hug. What really makes my heart sing is that most evenings, we end the day with a candlelit bath — and that’s when I really melt. Not just from the warmth of the water, but from the deep knowing that I can be completely myself here. No masks, no pretending. My whole body exhales because it knows: I’m safe — the kind of safe where I can just let go and be.
I’m so grateful for my life now — to live on this beautiful island, doing meaningful work, surrounded by forest and ocean. I’ve also created the kind of freedom that lets me spend time both here in BC and in the UK with my adult son and family.
And I share this because I know so many women long for this kind of freedom and safety — the kind that lets your body breathe your heart open. And I’ve discovered even if you’ve had a tricky relationship history, it’s absolutely possible to create that, from the inside out.
And it wasn’t always like this for me.
For nearly three decades, I was stuck in painful relationship patterns — chasing love yet ending up in situations that left me anxious, lonely, and dissatisfied. Just over 20 years ago I became a full-time single mum after a difficult ending with my son’s father.
Like many savvy women, I told myself I needed to work on me before entering another relationship, I did not want to go through that again. But despite the therapy, self-help books, and endless reflection, I continued to have difficult relationships and the loneliness just got louder. Loneliness isn’t something most of us want to hang out with. It’s uncomfortable, even scary — so we keep ourselves busy, distracted, in motion. I did too. You would have never known if you saw me out and about- I looked like the fun, spontaneous woman who was going with the flow. But underneath, my fear of being abandoned was quietly calling the shots.
I’d cling to partners who weren’t right for me, feel desperate when they pulled away, and tell myself this was just what love was — the highs and lows, heartbreak and hope. I even tried online dating, which only sped up the pattern: short-lived connections, rejection, seeking comfort in the next match, hoping it would be different. Ironically, I often wasn’t that interested in the person initially — but once I got attached, I’d feel crushed if it ended. Even after all the inner work that helped me see my patterns, I couldn’t stop repeating them. And because the results stayed the same, my confidence began to erode. Deep down, I wondered: is there something wrong with me? After all this work, why hadn’t anything changed? Maybe I was just too messed up to ever have a healthy relationship.
And then came the moment that changed everything.
After one of those brief connections ended, I called a girlfriend to debrief, like I’d done many times before. But this time, she stopped me mid-sentence and said, “Sarah, you don’t sound like yourself. This kind of thing shouldn’t be causing you this much stress. I think you need to stop dating for a while”
Her honesty hit hard. I realized how many times my friends had patiently listened to my heartbreaks — but this conversation was different. It was a mirror. As hard as it was to hear, a lightbulb went on. I didn’t want this to be my reality anymore. I got off the phone and looked in the mirror and, with the same loving firmness my friend had shown me, said, I love you but something has to change.” I decided: no more dating. My “taxi sign” said Not Available.
It wasn’t just a mental decision — my body made it for me. And it certainly wasn’t convenient for the part of me that was so hungry for love. To boot, my son had just left home. After 19 years of solo parenting, this was the time I could finally date freely, without worrying about anyone else. But my body had the last word.
I sought out mentors and practitioners and began to work at a slow, deliberate pace.
One day, during an EFT tapping session, my practitioner gently guided me to uncover the belief that was sitting at the root of all my patterns in love. She asked me why I kept being drawn to men with that push-pull dynamic. Without thinking, I said, “Because when they want me, it feels so powerful.”
She paused. Looked straight into my eyes.
And said softly, “You’re not wanted. That’s the belief.”
Her words hit me like a shockwave — right in my solar plexus. My chest tightened, my breath caught, and for a moment, everything went still. But instead of pushing the pain away, I let myself feel it — the ache, the grief, the truth of how long I’d been living from that wound.
We tapped through it, tears streaming, and then… something shifted. A quiet warmth spread through my body — like light filling the cracks. For the first time, I felt deeply wanted, not by someone else, but from within. As I left the session, a wave of compassion rushed over me. I had spent years feeling puzzled — and honestly ashamed — about why I kept being drawn to these addictive, hot-and-cold relationships. In that moment, it all made sense. If deep down I believed I wasn’t wanted, of course I would be magnetized to people who mirrored that pattern.
In the days that followed, I walked differently. My body felt grounded, alive, peaceful. This is what I now call my healthy baseline — where I could finally trust myself, feel safe in my own skin, and love being single. Not the kind of single that says “I don’t need anyone,” but the kind that whispers, “I’m enough.”
And that’s when love found me — gently, organically.
He sent a message. We went for a walk. We shared easy conversations. No diving in, no hot and cold. The third time we met, he brushed my shoulder as he spoke to me, and something deep inside me — calm and clear — simply said, yes. I didn’t choose from that empty loneliness or chemistry this time.
I chose from my nervous system — from that deep inner knowing that says: this is safe, this is real. That’s when I chose Dave.
I want you to imagine what it would feel like to stop repeating disempowering patterns, feel grounded in your body, and open to love that actually nourishes you. To reclaim your power and create a life — or relationship — that feels safe, expansive, and aligned with who you truly are.
I know many of you here have done the work too — therapy, books, workshops — and yet love still feels frustrating, confusing, or out of reach. You’re not alone. You can rewrite your love story — and it starts with coming home to yourself.
That’s exactly what we explore in my Ready for Love program which contains six transformational steps. I’ll guide you through somatic practices, breathwork, and movement tools that helped me — tools you can carry with you for the rest of your life. Tools that let you:
Feel safe and embodied in love
Release old patterns that no longer serve you
Step forward with clarity, confidence, and self-trust